Rajesh was a successful businessman. He could make many swift and the best decisions which were in favour of his organization. He was bestowed with various awards by many business associations. But he suffers a lot in his personal life as he was not able to say ‘no’ to his father. When his father compelled him to get married to a girl, he became so dumb. He was not interested to get married. But finally, he married the girl only to value his father’s words and he utilized the opportunity by showing his affection on his father. His munificence towards his father prevented him to express his desire or expectations on nuptial. At this moment, one year passed after his marriage, he goes to court to seek divorce and his life has become stressful completely. He could not attend meetings; concentrate on business. The shadow of his personal life crawls into his professional life and affects considerably.
This is just an instance of a man who miserably failed in his life for not able to display his side clearly by saying ‘no’ at an appropriate time. His incapability created a declivity on his business and converted his father as bedridden.
Here, there is no difference between Rajesh and us. A physical structure may differ from one person to another. Rajesh is a symbol of everyone. Many of us were or are reluctant to say ‘no’ strongly. We could see Rajesh in the mirror not physically but mentally. Many of us by and large felt bad soon after missing the opportunity to say ‘no’.
Rajesh could have avoided this muddle by strongly saying ‘no’ to the proposal and later his father could have been convinced. His cowardly act shook the relationship with his father.
Whoever reluctant to say ‘no’, they normally think they could please others by saying ‘yes’.
It is our life. We have to live our life the way we want. If we get confused among affection, pleasing, etc., we will end up with more troubles. Saying ‘yes’ is easier than ‘no’. Both words are small in size, but it contains our aspirations. So our desire must be expressed properly without any shilly-shallying. Keep in mind, whether we say yes or no, we are solely responsible for the repercussions.
No need to think of saying ‘no’ will project ourselves as rude and resentful. There is nothing like the person who says yes is good-hearted and no is stone-hearted. People sometimes connect this with a positive and negative mindset. It is an expression of our opinion. When we are requested to comment on something, a determined person will definitely express whatever he or she believes.
Saying ‘no’ will absolutely project you as a courageous person. But perpetually keep in a view on relationships and say yes could end up losing our identity. If we have a habit of saying yes, at one point in time people stop soliciting our opinion from us, they will presume ours is ‘yes’. Sometimes ‘yes’ could create problems and confusion but ‘no’ could safeguard us. It does not mean saying no for everything and everyone. Saying ‘no’ means giving more control and more value to you by yourself.
We have to make it as a habit to say no to anything which is not going to produce happiness or create any positive atmosphere.
Why do people always say ‘yes’?
- Saying yes is easier than no.
- Don’t want to hurt others’ feelings.
- Don’t want to upset others.
- Want to prove kindness to others.
- What others will think of me if I say ‘no.’
- We don’t want to have quarrel with others.
- This has become a habit.
- Why should we get caught by always saying yes?
Benefits of saying ‘No’
Project you as strong
Saying ‘no’ will bring out a strong and more confident person. You can start thinking about yourself as a strong person in front of others and will others do so.
You will respect yourself and people do not like much about your activity but gradually they can understand you and the power of ‘no’
You can save your time by saying say ‘no’ for unnecessary invitations and maintain distance from negative people. If you feel attending any party or any get together is killing your time, then you can certainly say no to that. This will generate more time for what you love to do.
Saying ‘no’ would yield or set proper relationships. People who do not want to get ‘no’ from you, will move out of your circle whereas people who can understand your ‘no’ will connect with you. They will recognize your limits of supporting others. Hence, the relationship with others would be robust.
So if you want to be so strong, analyze the situation and cultivate the habit of saying ‘no’.